Hi, this is Francisco Bujan from vitalcoaching.com and we are talking about dating a few guys at the same time. Is this a good idea or not? I mean if you are a woman and you are out there and you start flirting with a guy a little bit and at the same time there is another one that you think might be interesting as well. Is it a good idea to stay in touch with both to get them both what do you do with that?
That is a very important question. Do you have to choose for one as soon as you start going on a date with one on the other and I want to give you some tips on this situation and what to do with it what is the right choice what is really best.
My advice actually is quite simple as long as you are not committed with someone as long as it does not become a serious relationship, it is okay to keep options open and date a few guys at the same time.
If you go online and you start interacting with a few people, a few man it would be a mistake even to focus just on the one guy if you do not know what his response is going to be because, it creates an emotional commitment and that is the best thing you want.
You do not want to commit yourself emotionally to somebody before it is clear that he feels the same towards you and that he wants to be in a committed relationship with you. The more that you give too much without receiving back that is the moment where you get hurt with dating.
So, the idea is to keep your options open and yes it is a very good idea to date casually, lightly; a few guys at the same time maybe two or three. That really works, why? Because the form of that is not really into you that much and you always have other options open.
The moment where you get hurt really, it is the moment where you start giving your life, being exclusive with somebody when in fact you do not know what he is going to do, he might be dating somebody else he might still be with his ex, or he might have somebody else in mind.
You are going to invest into somebody without responding back to you to the same extent and that is very tricky because it will create an emotional imbalance. So, if you start dating a few guys at the same time, how do you deal with that?
The first thing to realize is that during the time you are still with him the casual dating phase and during that time I would recommend, encouraging not to engage into having sex, you know having intercourse during that time.
This creates a very different level of commitment and also you know, it is not that is it nowadays as well to have too much, too many casual sex partners as well. So, you keep your options open you date lightly with a few guys at the same time it does not mean that you have to share absolutely everything with all of them.
You do not have to tell your whole love life stories; you can keep some into your dating activities. Guys do not have to know everything about your life. Because, maybe they are still seeing their ex in a casual way or maybe they have somebody else in mind and they are not really going to tell you the whole story about that.
So, it is very important for you to realize that in the beginning without lie, you do not have to unveil actually your whole life. This is a testing period where you learn to know each other and especially with online dating it is very important that you do not commit yourself emotionally to just one person.
Do not become exclusive in early stages because, you can really get hurt. If you have a crush on somebody and there is not the response you were expecting and this can really be tough you know, you might give up on dating, because, it feels like a tough rejection. So, the idea really is to keep your options open.
Have access to more than one guy at the same time you can really could make it in the right way and once you start feeling that your love is reciprocated that you start committing yourself a little bit more to him as well, and this really works and usually this will happen almost instantly if you have a mutual crush but otherwise it might happen after a few days, a few weeks or even a couple of months dating okay?
Hope this made sense take care, have a good day. Bye, bye.
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