Embarrassing Pregnancy Problems

Eils Hewitt: Pregnancy is the mostly wonderful experience, but sometimes it does come with some rather potential embarrassing elements from constipation and piles to leaky boobs and inconsonant. Pregnant ladies, well we face it all. Don't we? Gill Scott, a Midwife and Zoe Bolton, the Editor of Flying Start Magazine are here to guide you though these bad phase moments. Good Morning ladies! Zoe Bolton: Good morning. Eils Hewitt: Thanks for coming in. Now, Zoe if I ask you first, what are the main worries and concerns that pregnant ladies have? Zoe Bolton: I think obviously, pregnancy is a time for worrying and women have lots and lots and lots of questions. But the main embarrassing things that we're talking about today are things like, will I have bowel moment during birth, will I being inconsonant after I give birth, will my busts be saggy after I give a birth? These are sort of physical things and I think it's kind of a displacement worry. Some of them they don't have to face it to the fact that they're going into the labor and it's going to her, so they sort of displace these on to these other things. And then they find that they're too embarrassed to ask to their doctor about them. Eils Hewitt: Yeah, I was going to say that, why do we worry so much? Presumably, hormonal as well, we have got all sort of things. Zoe Bolton: Absolutely. Eils Hewitt: Very concerned about things that are out of their control. I was just going to say in terms of advice and generally about embarrassing problems, I mean do you laugh if off or do you kind tackle it or do you advice ladies to go their doctors or so for example your magazine will do. Zoe Bolton: I think the intensively embarrassing questions, the advice we give to our readers is if it's something that you're concerned about, you should never be too embarrassed to discuss it with your Midwife or GP. These people are professionals, they are used to being asked these questions. Don't worry too much about, go and so once you've taken your first step and you got out of the first hurdle, then I think the worrying sort of goes. And it's more comforting to go and ask and help and be told the answer. Well, we have got lots of crazy scenarios and we wonder about what's going to help then? Gill Scott: Well the worst things talk to other people, it just gets worse the most when you talk to friends, their experience was worse than the last person's and then there are lots of Chinese whispers. Eils Hewitt: That's true actually but the time you go it to have your birth, you've got 20 mums experiences in your head. Gill Scott: That's right. Eils Hewitt: And I was really concerned. It's because that you mentioned about the bowel movement. Well, I know, I'll put my hand up, that was my main concern. I was fine about everything else. I've done all the antenatal classes, go to the information all upfront but the concern is really concern about having a bowel movement during birth. I didn't at that time, I mean I was in pool the rest of it but I know -- imagine to ladies writing about that. Zoe Bolton: Yeah, they do and it's more about what their partner is going to think of them actually? Eils Hewitt: Oh, really. Zoe Bolton: Yeah, it's not the fact they were with on their own, it will be okay. But it's a fact that their partners, what he can think of me if I have a bowel movement during the time I'm giving birth? Is it going to make him find me less attracted, is he going to be disgusted with me? I think that really is the main source of the problem is what other people think not the fact that it's going to happen. And when I've spoken to women who have given birth, they don't even notice when it does happen because they are too busy concentrating on trying to have a baby. Eils Hewitt: That's right, a new experience. Gill Scott: Often, what happens is that when women go into labor, you don't really read about this too much but the body is a wonderful thing and it will and lot of the times, you will have diarrhea, you'll have very loose bowel movements just before you go into labor and so your body will get rid of access waste, so to speak and sometimes that happens. Alternatively, people do have their bowels open and we're very discrete about it and we keep inco pads in to where the necessary area is and take it away and we throw it away. So we're very discrete. Eils Hewitt: Absolutely. We must say you could have forget also that Midwifes do this every time. Gill Scott: We're very used to and it happens and it's very common, very, very common. Eils Hewitt: While we are on pills, constipation. Now obviously once you've had a baby, they say obviously watch your eating stuff because you're quite a lot to be constipated and obviously if you have had stitches, that you're really concerned about it anyway -- . Gill Scott: Well, in fact what happens is that it's not constipation. When you've had a baby, we wouldn't expect your bowels to be open to at least three, four days after you've had your baby. So that's normal, that's a normal thing. That can be, if you imagine you've had -- your baby inside and all your intestines have been moved and displaced out of the way and squished and squashed. So once you've had your baby, they settle back down and then your normal rhythm will come back. Zoe Bolton: Actually, I'm speaking to women who've had children and they said the first poo after giving birth is actually more painful than the birth. Often, that's something that they just don't worry about at all and then they find that's actually the worst part. Eils Hewitt: Well, I think that's probably just tension as well. Gill Scott: Expectations. [Cross Talk] Gill Scott: Like you said you had stitches as well, but all as I can say is drink plenty of water. That's relaxant in itself, so keep hydrated it and things will be fine. Eils Hewitt: Keep things moving. What about leaky boobs then? Do you have people who are concerned about leaky boobs? Zoe Bolton: Yeah, that is one of things because I think potentially it's quite embarrassing, if you get caught out in public and I think again, it's not the fact that they leak, it's a fact that women are worried about what other feel think, will think about them if they're out and it just happened. And we read stuff where they constantly say I don't want to get caught out, what if it happens, I'm really about? But I think the advice that we give them is all pregnant women produce milk, it's part of being pregnant and it's a good thing saying you can breastfed your baby so you should never ashamed of it. There are things and measures you can take by disposable breast pads. And if you're worried, just wear them when you go out, take the preventive measures to stop, to prevent the embarrassment. Don't worry about it? Eils Hewitt: If you had anybody relative with really embarrassing story of when they leaked? Zoe Bolton: No, I mean no really. I think it happens to quite a lot of women. They look down and if they are wearing a light colored jumper and - Gill Scott: It's often when it's triggered by when they hear a crying baby. It's all hormonal and it's a let down reflex and it's all primitive I'm afraid and it's there and it's nothing we can do to stop it. Eils Hewitt: Yeah, I have my worse fortunately, my worst leaking moment. I was actually went alone to one of these called breastfeeding cafés that we have got in our area. It's great actually because these mums just sit around chatting and they talk about problems of breastfeeding and stuff. But you actually relax and have a cup of tea at the same time and so I was just chatting away and I said to the Midwife, if you could gives us few tips and advice. She says, yeah, we obviously ready to feed. So obviously you right breast is ready to feed. I looked down and it spreads - this is the best place for this to happen. Once this happens once, you just keep breast pads in the hand bag. And you go through so many which is oh, goodness. So if we see any -- grab them -- One of the other questions people have, will I have increased vaginal discharge? Again, it might too be embarrassing because doctors do check -- Gill Scott: Yeah we do. We always say that and right from the start, that's something that you can't avoid. The thing is though you need to keep an eye on things, you need to keep a check on that because can get infections and we don't want that to happen. So I would always strongly encourage women to say that if there is an offensive smell in the discharge or if they don't feel quite right, then they need to see the Midwife because then what we can do, we can take a little swap and just make sure that there is no infection and we can deal with that. Infection is a real big issue in pregnancy because it can have a knock on effect which is quite serious. So any problems like that, not to ignore, go see a Midwife straight way. Eils Hewitt: Just be on the safe side. Isn't it? Right sex, the questions all the questions ladies have is it safe to have sex during pregnancy and how soon after are probably the main concerns? Gill Scott: Yes. Definitely women can have sex during the pregnancy and often men make the most of it because well be it the wife -- after the baby is born. Sex, man have a hang up more than women actually about it and do often have partners asking me at antenatal classes -- taking to me to one side and asking is it alright, can I do that? And yes it is. You have to know your partner and listen to what she is saying but general sex is okay. And afterwards obviously, if you can imagine where the placenta is being, it's an open wound and which is why you bleed after you've had your baby. What we like to say is once that's healed out, once you stop bleeding, then yes, sex is okay but I'm sure you can find lots of other ways to keep you immune. Zoe Bolton: I think one of the really common things and I think a lot of men worry about this is that, the pain that is actually going to sort of nurture sort the baby when they have sex and that's a really common thing I get to read, some women think that as well. And the advice that we give, we say well, the baby is protected in the amniotic site, so that's not going to happen and I actually know some women who use that as an excuse. Eils Hewitt: No, they say it'll harm the baby, we can't do. Zoe Bolton: We can't have sex because it will harm the baby. We know we can't do it, so we probably shouldn't be revealing that it is okay. Because those women now will be stuck. They will have an excuse. Eils Hewitt: Breast growing can kind of like after saggy after pregnancy and that kind of stuff. Is there anything you could do, advice or does an exercise help? Zoe Bolton: I think you never ever discover your true body, until you've had a baby and for some women not can be wonderful, their shape can change, they can more be more curvaceous. But for some women, the breasts do go saggy. Mostly, because of breastfeeding which today we have to think about, why you're doing this. And you're doing this because you can nourish your baby in the best way. The thing that we says that wear a supportive bra, sports bra and because it is tendency to become stretched and that's what causes the sagginess. So its preventive measures that you can take to stop it from happening. Gill Scott: I always advice women get three good maternity bras. One on, one in the wash and one ready to go because it is very important and like you say, rightly so -- preventive is better than finding out that it is bit too late. But also another thing I just want to say on saggy breast is that if you lose weight too quickly after you've had your baby, they become quite saggy or they can they've got the potential to. So don't be in such a rush to get back to that pre-pregnant size because -- take it slowly. Zoe Bolton: Yeah, I think it's really better. Actually, that's one of the things that lots of my readers are concerned about -- they write and they say there is so much pressure now to lose weight because you get people like Victoria Beckham in the paper, two minutes after they have given birth, size 6 skinny jeans. Gill Scott: But she doesn't look good as well. Zoe Bolton: But presumably, she's had one of lettuce and it's really unhealthy to do that. It can have derogatory effects. It can increase stretch marks, you can end up with excess skin because your body has not the time to adjust, so you end up being a little healthier and happier if you take it slowly. Gill Scott: Absolutely. Eils Hewitt: So just to finish then, just sort of quick advice from both of you in terms of handling these embarrassing questions. What would be your advice to ladies? Zoe Bolton: I think my advice would be, try and get over the embarrassment as soon as you can and go and speak to your GP or Midwife because they will be able to put your mind at rest and you don't need to worry about it. Gill Scott: Absolutely, I would agree with that. We're used to dealing with these questions and probably have been asked five or six times already in that day, so it's not that you know on your own. Eils Hewitt: Yeah, we have had many questions which you have already answered. Gill Scott: Absolutely. Eils Hewitt: Well thank you very much ladies for coming in and putting all our minds at rest. Zoe Bolton: Thank you.