Hooking up is everywhere. Movies, magazines, the internet. Even though it is seen as common
and maybe even encourage, there's a double standard around hooking up. We give men a lot
more leeway in these encounters than we do women. Men are congratulated for conquest, while
women are labeled. However, this new age of girl power, many women relished their own social
conquest.
Now an interesting facet of the hook up culture is how differently the genders view it. Men and
women look at hooking up from totally different points of view. Men enjoy the status quo of
hooking up, and if a relationship develops as a result of an encounter, that’s just fine. They have
the power to control the intensity of the relationship. On the other hand, the female view point
falls along two distinct lines. Some girls hope that the encounter will evolve into a relationship,
so hooking up is the first natural step in a potential relationship. The second group is fiercely
committed to sexual freedom and power. They're disillusioned by love and avoid commitment.
Their only interest is be admired and pursued. The guy becomes a means to an end. Hooking up
is regarded as a hobby, like backgammon.
So here's some suggestions, if you were involved in a hook up culture of if you are worried about
someone who is, beware of these dangers. Hooking up is very dangerous. Don’t have sex with
someone you don’t know very well. There could be diseases, legal issues, and psychological
problems that can harm you for a few weeks or for the rest of your life.
Cart before the horse. Don’t began this habit of substituting physicality for emotional
connection. It is much more difficult to focus on building a lasting relationship once you have
introduced sex. 20 and 30 something couples now have the least amount of sex in part because of
the hook up culture. They have no idea how to integrate sex into a committed intimate
relationship. In their minds, sex is for being single not for marriage.
So please, to avoid thousands of dollars in therapy bills, try going on a date before you go to the
bedroom
For more information and tips, please visit my website at gearingup.com. I'm Dr. Sylvia Gearing.
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