Help! My Husband is Addicted to Porn!

www.AskDanAndJennifer.com Dating, relationships, love, and great sex Jennifer Okay, this question is from Serena in Illinois. Dear Dan and Jennifer: My boyfriend of five years is always seemed like an honest person. I recently found internet porno in my computer. When I ask him about it, he lied, of course. He knows I am dead setting into porn. It made me feel disgusting about inside and out. I told him that if that is what he needs, then I am gone because I cannot and would not live like that. He swears to never do it again. Is he being truthful? Okay, question one plus, if he knew I was against it, why would he still do it? It made me feel like I am not good enough for him. Did I do something wrong for this to take place? Thanks for taking the time to read this, Serena. [Music Playing]] Dan Wow! Is he being truthful? God only knows the man’s under the rest. He is terrified. No, really! She is going to leave him if he watches porn. He is terrified. All right, this is obviously a big thing about control. Jennifer Yes, It about control thing. Dan It really is and there is an interesting thing in a longer version of the question she talks about really doing everything she can to meet his desires, right? To do whatever he wants, whatever. But oh my god, this is so gross, overtone from this question. Jennifer Yes, the whole question was like, I am so disgusted, I cannot believe he did this to me. Dan And one, he did not do anything to her. So I guess, what I am wondering is, these desires that she is always meeting for him are these things that she think she will be his desires or should they actually talk and does actually know what his desires are. Jennifer That is true. Dan I mean showbiz has really strong beliefs about porn. Jennifer Yes, and the question I have on this is where did these beliefs come from? I mean, sometimes I am really bad about answering questions with questions because I think if we explore our own inner thoughts and the emotions we can know where these things are coming from but one of the questions I have is, why do you feel that it is wrong for him to watch porn? You know, take that further, do you believe this is wrong for anyone to watch porn? And I am going to challenge you to even dig a little bit deeper. What is it that is wrong with watching porn? You know, do you find the whole idea of watching someone have sex disgusting? I mean you use that word a lot in your question, disgusting. Do you find watching sex disgusting? Do you find sex disgusting? You know or there are some other issues around that or is it the fact that he is watching this without you present? You know, what are these really underlying issues why you feel this is such a wrong thing? Dan Yes, but I am really not getting into five that she feels cheated on. I am just getting really disgusted thing from her about watching porno, maybe sex. Jennifer Yes Dan But here is a very interesting question, have you tried watching it with him? I mean that is a very noble concept. Jennifer Rather than judging, and tried doing it together Dan Yes, because it could really enhance your sex life. A lot of granted guys some of the hardcore stuff that lot of women want nothing to do with. Jennifer But even said that, you know having said that, there is nothing wrong with sitting down and watching this really hardcore stuff with him once or twice, just this okay what is about this that excites you because then you can implement those same things in your own sex life. Dan: Yes that is really powerful. Knowing what it is that excites him because obviously, he likes it for some reason. And you know, if you make him afraid to tell you or afraid to watch in your own home, then he watches somewhere else. Jennifer He is going to hide it. It is not that it is an addiction, but it is definitely something that gets him excited. And we all know men are very driven, by their lower brain, not always their upper brain. Dan Sometimes Jennifer So, if he gets so excited, he is probably going to do it again. And the question you have to