How to Get Guys to Respect You When Dating

Hi! This is Francisco Bujan from vitalcoaching.com and we are talking about dating success for women. The topic for this video is how to get guys to respect you. If you are dating you are going to come across every now and then, a guy is going to be very gushy or be demanding or if he is a space invader, you are in the café and he comes just a bit too close and he starts touching you. Now, when this happens you have to express your power. If you do not educate guys, they simply take you for granted. They are simply across the line and do not respect your boundaries. So, if this happens you have to actually educate the guy. You have to tell him, “Hey! You are being too close.” That is something that you can say. Now, I know that most guys are respectful right? They know how to treat a woman, they will keep their distance, they respect your freedom, do not take you for granted, do not clean you when they start dating you these kind of things. It is important that you have enough power. You have resources and a set of strategies to handle that situation. Next thing you want is you have to put a boundary, stay respectful towards the person when you do that. But, make them realize that they are going a bit too far. There are situations where guys once you start dating them they are going to try to start controlling your life. by simply being demanding, by being jealous, they are going to question your choices. Question your career choices sometimes they are going to tell you what to do and when this happens there is something very simple that you can do. You can look at them and simply say something like, “I do not actually remember giving you the right to tell me what to do.” when you say that your decided that it was okay to control my life. This kind of statements sends out a very clear message that is very true right. The man does not have the right to ruin your life. And, the only reason why he would take that step and start bossing you around or being controlling, and jealous, and demanding is simply because you allow him to do that. Okay, I know that it might be challenging to say no to somebody but that is the first step that you have to learn to actually create healthy boundaries for yourself and your life. if you let a man come into your life and let him boss you around, let him control your life, then you are going to end up in a place where he limits your freedom, and that is not good. So, you have to step back, and educate him. “I do not actually remember giving you the right to tell me what to do.” Remember, that is a very simple statement to say and when you express it he will think you are right. And, he will step back and simply give you your space. Something, which is important, is, when you go on a date, when a guy buys you a drink that is all he is buying. You do not have to actually go and get intimate with him, you do not have to go and sleep and have sex. It does not give him the right to again own you simply because he buys you a drink. When he buys you a drink that is all that he is buying, he is not buying your body, he is not buying your time, and he is not buying your commitment. When you are in the original stages of dating when you are not yet committed to somebody, it is okay to date all the guys. It is okay to keep your oceans open. It is okay if you go for your freedom and enjoy it. You get a feeling that you do not owe anything to that person. What I want to mention again now is simply has to do with your power. Right now, you can simply take a white page and write down what is your level of power right now, between 0% and 100% when you are interacting with guys. And if you score very low, if you are someone between 50% or 60% or even lower, then the goal is really to start raising your power to a high place, so that you can express, be more confident when you are out there in the dating environment and how do you lift? Well, one of the things that you can do is, making sure that you keep healthy career line. When you start taking away your career then it is going to make you loose power because it makes you loose financial defense. And by staying physically fit and healthy all that leads to raising your power. Okay? I hope this makes sense, you take care and have a great day, bah bye.