Hi! I am Rachel Greenwald, and I am a dating coach, matchmaker and author of the new book, Why He Didn't Call You Back.
After talking to a thousand men over 10 years, the number one reason that men told me that they do call women back, as if the women seems kind or nice and thoughtful.
Now at first I thought that sounds so boring, and in fact that wasn't what they were saying. For example, one woman went on a coffee date at Star Bucks with a guy, they were on the side condiment bar putting sugar in their coffee and she accidentally spilled a little bit of sugar on the countertop and she just grabbed the napkin and wiped up the countertop and she kept walking, and he asked her later, he said the staff would wipe up the countertop, you don't have to do that. And she said, I just wouldn't want the next person to have to look at someone else's mess. He thought wow, that's really considerate.
Another guy described being in a restaurant with his date, and the waitress came by and made a rude remark, and after she walked away he said to his date, look she is obnoxious. And the woman said, "Well you know maybe she is just having a hard time with this crowd tonight, let's giver her a break." And the guy thought, very compassionate person. She is really someone I could envision, spending a lot of time with.
There was another guy I interviewed who was a doctor and he had been on call the night before his date and he arrived at her house to pick her up, she had him sit in a comfortable chair in the living room and she went to open the bottle of wine, and by the time she came back he'd actually become so relaxed that he'd fallen sleep. And she just sat there for about 15 minutes quietly and picked up a book and started to read, and when he woke up he expected her to get angry or to get defensive and instead she said, "Oh you looked exhausted, I thought you could use a quick nap before we went out." And he later told me in our interview that the kind of woman who wouldn't get offended and mad when her date fell asleep is the kind of woman he can envision coming home to the rest of his life.
She go into her first date thinking pro-actively about how you can show the side of view that's kind, thoughtful, considerate and supportive, you will be way ahead of the game.
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