You know, a lot of your quality time happens right here, in the sweet, sweet family mini-van.
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So I am clearing the breakfast dishes yesterday and my son is helping me, he looks over me and says, so dad, what do you think of that Michael Phelps video, I would have been less shock if he’d clobbered in the head with a skillet. Alarms going off of my head like, hey, parenting moment, parenting moment! You are the anti-drug, this is a significant moment. My ten-year-old is asking me to talk with him about really important issues like drugs and I know this is a big moment. So I say, yeah, weird. That option wasn’t going to cut it, what a weak showing.
I mean here he comes, he is asking me a significant question where I am ready to bring my wisdom to bear and I say, weird! All day I am going to remedy the situation by sitting down and talking to him about it. So I got the perfect venue here, right? It’s the oldest parenting trick in the book. You get them buckled in, you’re rolling down the road, they can’t escape, you sit them down, you give them the drug talk, and the plan works perfectly because I’ve got to take him to his basketball game last night. So we get in and we get rolling and I realize that I don’t have a freaking idea of what I am going to say.
I ask him. I said this, oh! What do you think of -- what did you think of the Michael Phelps video? He said, you know dad, I am just really glad it wasn’t steroids, because then he wouldn’t be able to swim in the next Olympics and that answer puzzled me, it threw me, and I had to think about it, but quickly, because we are in the middle of a conversation, and I was trying to sort through all the values that went into that response to my question.
It’s media and it’s sports heroes and steroids and pot versus steroids and about the time that I decide that, well, you know, pot is drugs but steroids are drugs and cheating, then he asks me, hey dad! What do you think about it? And I didn’t have any time to prepare or really think about what my response was going to be, so I just answered honestly.
I said, something like, you know son, it’s kind of disappointing, I kind of get it. You know I sort of understand, the guy’s whole life has been about discipline and training and he has all the success and suddenly he has this freedom and he makes a bad choice. People make bad choices. Mom, dads, even if you are the fastest swimmer on earth, you make bad decisions. Hopefully, it’s a decision that you can learn something from and you don’t make time and again.
After that I said, so do you know what pot is and he said, no. So the conversation got a little botanical for a minute as I sort of described what pot is, not that I know. And I said, you know, it’s not very good for developing brains, and you know what it’s kind of like tobacco, there is all these chemicals in it, you don’t know what it is, or where it’s from, and you don’t really want to be putting that in your body. Fortunately the did you inhale moment never happened. I guess I got to think about that now.
I said, you know, sooner or later at some point someone is going to offer you some of this stuff. Have you thought at all about you might say? Answer was, satisfying if not a little bit predictable and I said, well, you know, in my experience if so long as you are not super judgmental and you are polite and you are not rude and you just say, no thank you, people will respect that pretty well. And a guy that keeps pushing it on you and saying time-to-time, come on, come on, that guy is an a**hole, and to be avoided.
Finally we pulled up the basketball game and he was out, I have never seen the kid get out of a car faster than that. In the end Michael Phelps, dude, I got to say, you helped me and my son have our first conversation about drugs and it went pretty well.
So as far as I am concerned you and me, we’re good and good luck in 2012. This show is called quality time and that’s about all the quality time I got with you good people. Thanks again to all the folks at BABYBJORN for helping us roll today.
Hey! If you’ve got an idea about how to have the first conversation with your kid about drugs or this whole Michael Phelps thing, hang-on over to dadlaps.com and join the conversation there, I think it happens to be the best parents forum online.
Come, check it out, let us know what you think.
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