How to Have Healthy Sex When Recovering From Sex Addiction
On behalf of tvlesson.com, I'm Dr. Carol Clark, a sex therapist with drcarolclark.com. In this clip, I'm going to tell you how to have healthy sex when you’re in recovery from sex addiction. You know, a lot of people don’t even want to admit that sex addiction exist because they say we all need sex. We’re sexual beings and sex is a perfectly natural activity. So how can one be addicted to sex?
But of course, we’re talking about sexual behaviors, not all sex. So it’s important to first identify those behaviors that are addictive, whether it’s going on the computer, masturbation, going to strip clubs, picking up prostitutes. Those are the addictive behaviors. And what we want to do is be able to have healthy sex in a committed, caring, intimate way with a loving partner.
A lot of people think that having sex is intimacy. But really we know its not. Having sex is something between two bodies. It’s the mental preparation we bring to it, the mental attitude that we bring to the activity that makes it intimate. Intimacy is about being connected, about really being present with your partner and aware of your partner. And that’s how we have healthy sex is by being aware of this person is dear to me. This is a person I love. This is a person I care about and sex springs from that caring and intimacy.
So what we tend to do is put the cart before the horse with sex. We have sex and then say now we've been intimate. But in reality, we want to be intimate and make sex an expression to that intimacy. So make sure that when you have sex, it’s with a caring, committed, loving partner with whom you feel a true intimate connection. And then that’s sexual activity will be an expression of that intimacy. And that’s how we have healthy sex.
On behalf of tvlesson.com, this has been Dr. Carol Clark. Thank you for watching.
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