Hi, this is Francisco Bujan from vitalcoaching.com.
On the line of understanding guys, we are now going to check a very specific question. Why does he not call back?
Imagine that you had this great date with this man, with this guy, and after these dates, you suddenly do not hear about him. He might not call back for a whole week, maybe two weeks or not at all, and you wonder what is going on. So as soon as you had this date with him, you probably think, “Okay, well, let us call him. Let us tell him that I really enjoyed this time with him, and that I want to see him again.”
Now, if he does not follow up on that, if he does not actually initiate the contact, if he does not actually feel like he wants to be with you, you might question it. He might say things like, “Well, I had a great time.” “I really care for you.” “It was wonderful meeting you.” The connection was excellent and still you see him not taking steps. What does it mean?
I have to be clear with you. I have to be really honest. What it means is that he is not as interested in you as he says he is.
It is very often that a guy will say certain words. He would say things like, “I really want to be with you.” “I really like what we share”, but at the same time, he will do things which are quite different to what he says.
So, what you have to remember is that actions talk much more clearly and more lovely than words. If he says something and then does something else, you have to follow his actions and understand that his actions are the real signs. This is what he is doing and this is what he means.
So, if he does not call you back, if he does not respond your text messages, or if he does not e-mail you back, it means just one thing. It means that he is not that interested into having a relationship right now.
Maybe it does not have to do anything with you. Maybe he is worried with work. Maybe his mind is not available. Maybe he is stressed by all the things. Maybe he is still out of relationship—out of a recent relationship and still recovering from it. There can be dozens of reasons why a guy is not going to engage into a relationship at a given moment, and maybe, lots of those reasons had nothing to do with you.
So, do not blame yourself. Do not think that it is a bad thing. If you feel that it is a form of rejection, and I am sure you feel it that way a little bit, the goal is really to understand how to deal with it and how to overcome this feeling of rejection, to keep on going and start dating straight away all the guys, establish new connections on the connections that you already had. This is the whole point and the whole idea. If you feel this as a rejection, then take steps to start dating somebody else straight away. Because if you wait, if you wait for him to take steps, most of the times it can be very, very disappointing.
So, check a couple of times. Yes, it is okay to initiate the contact. It is okay to tell him. If you want to send him a quick message to see if he is open for another date. It is okay for you to initiate it.
Now, if he does not get back to you, if he does not answer, take this as a sign that he is not interested. He is saying, “No, thanks. I want to move on or do something else.” And, you have to be really, really smart to get the dating well because sometimes, the guys is going to say something and then acts a different way. And, you have to understand that. If you do not want to get stuck and really get fixed on the guy simply because he said he liked you, but in fact through his actions, he is telling you something else, then you have to be really smart and be able to step back. Get back whatever emotions you invested in him and re-invest them into your dating world, into your dating life, in all the guys who will be open to dating you and giving you another sense of ambition.
So, if he does not call back or if does not initiate the contact, it often means that he is not that interested. So, step back and release them back. Take your freedom back and consider your self 100% free and ready to go again on other dates.
Take care for now and have a great day! Bye-bye.
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