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Teaching Toddlers To Share
Most parents want to raise their children to be kind and to share when playing with others. When your toddler refuses to share her toys, she isn't really being selfish. She is just acting her age, sharing is a skill that is developed overtime, in the mean time struggle over toys will be common.
If you child is two or younger, diversion and redirection will be the most effective strategy. Children learn how to share from their parents and their siblings. They pay attention to your actions and they will follow your lead. So if you share they will eventually learn to share. Play side by side with your child and get them accustomed to sharing with you.
Share toys, your food or any other items that are saved for them to explore. Teach your child sharing words. Let's take turns, would you like a try, can you share? If your child is three or older and you want to avoid tantrums over sharing, let your child hide a few of his favorite play things before friends arrive. Tell him that these toys he doesn't have to share. Let your child know that the toys that are left out are for everyone to play with. Never punish your child for not sharing and don't make a big deal out of it. You don't want sharing to become a power struggle.
When he doesn't share, you can step in and speak for him. Once again, you are modeling compassion and a behavior that you would like your child to display. Example, your son doesn't want to share his toy and he grabs it from another child. You can say to the other child, I am sorry he grabbed the shovel, he was excited to use it today. Would you like to use it when he is done? And then you can say to your son, Aaron please get mummy's help when you need a toy. Grabbing is not okay. I will always help.
If a child grabs the toy that your child is using, you can say, Ben is using this toy right now, when he is done I will let you use it, sound good. Children want to be understood and they will eventually trust your words and will model your caring, sharing behavior.
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