So, we have talked about some of the basic displays of comfort. We talked about head tilt and smiling, and so forth. These are common displays of comfort. So, let me now introduce you to some discomfort displays, and have you begin to think about the most common ones that you see everyday.
Now, most of the discomfort that we show is actually in our face. And, nature prepared us this way because we are actually designed to orient towards each others faces to see what is there.
This is not just cultural, this is universal. We orient towards the face to see what is there, to see if there is comfort or discomfort. Do we see a smile? No smile, do we see head tilt? No head tilt.
But, one of the easiest ways to see discomfort is for instance in the forehead. Do we see any furrowing of the forehead? Do we see the kneading eyebrows, and so forth? These signs of discomfort that we normally associate with day to day life are real time indicators of what is going on in the brain.
Now, the brain could get by just fine without transmitting these messages, but keep in mind that for millions of years, at least for about four to five millions years, we communicated none verbally. There was no need to communicate verbally until about let us say, a hundred thousand years ago. So, this communication is very ancient in us, and it existed to let each other know that something is going on in our brains.
So, we look for Science of discomfort first and foremost on the face. We will see it in the forehead, we will see it if people touching their foreheads, rubbing their forehead, you have all seen somebody going like this, yes. There is an issue, something is bothering them, maybe they have a headache, maybe they are stressed, whatever, but it is indicated in the face.
The next area that we often see is in the eyes. When things are good, our pupils, the orbits of our eyes dilate, when things are bad, they constrict. And, they constrict to the level which is really significant because you can see someone that you perhaps do not like, and/or revealing an issue that you do not like, and you will actually begin to squint your eyes, your eyes will squint to begin to transmit this discomfort. And, you say, why is that we have this need to transmit?
It is very simple, for millions of years, we needed to tell each other how we felt at anyone time, and a baby is born the same way. It needs to communicate how it truly feels moment by moment. And so, the face is one of the best places to look for that.
We talked earlier about the neck, the neck will become very rigid and very tensed when things are bad. In fact, it become so tensed, what do we usually see? Somebody rubbing their neck, massaging their neck because they are under so much stress.
So, we talked about earlier the distancing that we do with our torso, and this is very indicative of discomfort. In fact, not only do we push away but there is the old saying, while he turns his back on me. This is an extreme form of displeasure. This is an extreme form of showing that we are uncomfortable. This, what we have come to call ventral denial.
We ventrally front the things we like, hey! How are you? Good to see you. The things that we do not like, we ventrally deny, so we turn sideways away from them. We do not give them access, not even visual access to the front of us. This is a way of demonstrating that there are issues, and you will see this with people sitting down where they are leaning towards you quite open during a presentation. But, as issues arise, you begin to see less and less of the front of them and more and more of their shoulders. This is clear indicative of discomfort.
So we have talked about the face that which is the primary place to look for discomfort, the neck, the torso, and so forth, and the legs. The legs are extremely accurate when we are looking forward to discomfort. And, one of the ways that we often see it with the feet literally turning away, and pointing towards an exit.
The feet are saying, you know what, I am so uncomfortable here that this is the way that I want to go. On
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