Francisco: Hi! This is Francisco Bujan from vitalcoaching.com and if you listen to a couple of previous videos. You know that I am having conversation with here with Phoebe on the dating successful guys and she is talking about males. Guys will make her feel really good and she is giving you some tips here, which I think our very important to listen directly from the girl.
Again, she is not PhD in psychology. She is not an expert on dating but she comes from a direct life experience and I think that is what the guys need to hear.
So, welcome again. The question I want to ask you, you already said that you know probably maybe five to 10% of guys express of for this male hood. It means that have 90% of men out there you are no expressing this quantities and the question that they have for you is if you are not expressing confidence in male hood what are the expressing. How do they come across to you? How would you describe them then?
Phoebe: The in fair and desperate to be on this and is get on worse so this all look, sort like my generation because of family independent. A lot of men are very desperate so it is all like look down female rejection from man is really like the end of the world and it just cannot seem to coup at the end.
A lot of the competences are not and I think man get mix messages for me to how they supposed to behave and that was I touch your feeling love you. Or macho... On it is like just be your self it is just personal. First of all, they have to like themselves because if they do not like themselves we consent that and when we are not going to like you either, and stop with the charade of putting on different personalities out so not them. And they try to present themselves as somebody they are not because I think you know that will impress a woman it does not.
Francisco: Like what?
Phoebe: It is like, you know. Hey, I am really confident and I am doing really well in life and I do not know I do not have any feelings and where wearing it is like of course you do. You are human you have feelings it is not pretending like you do nothing bothers you and I like you but I am not going to show you I like you because I will I do not know if gay or something. It is just ridiculous how man spend most of the time trying to somebody to do not instead of just spending that time on being them selves and a lot of woman will like them all if they just themselves.
Francisco: Themselves but confident.
Phoebe: Yes, confident I mean all this that from thing you have to have worked to. But the minute you start being your self you will automatically become more confident because you are not performing a show.
Francisco: Okay, you mentioned that just in the beginning with this of your answer you say they are in fear and desperate. What you mean exactly, there are afraid of what? I mean.
Phoebe: Well, rejection. I do not know what it is but it is like of man there self-esteem depends on the woman the way of how the woman feels about them it is like, it could be very successful in business which is all also good things and it is always praise by society. But if a woman rejects them it is like, my God! It is the end of the world, and because they are not allowed to fall apart. When that happens, they have to look like home over to move it? It is worst, because they do not actually express how they feel or deal with the feelings.
And then, this desperation because you know, they do not know who men like likes to clock out, the number of woman at to being with because you are not. I have had 20 women… well, I have 15. It is like they got to be constantly having women different to make themselves look like some and if guys has another deals within the year then he is gay it is like it is so stupid.
So, then they have to sort like go for that soul step and that is why for example you can talk to a guy now and you slept to be talking to him in a casual known situation but in his mind you’re his. And the if you like go somewhere else like you talk to somebody else he is acting you married him or something and that is happen a lot now. It is like you know you just to talk to a guy and he just thinks that he owns you. Because it is so desperate to get to know and it is ridiculous is like embarrassing.
Francisco: So, you get the feeling that when you have a guy coming to you, does it happen often that will reject him. That you open you I do not want to have a conversation with you.
Phoebe: No, because I am very fun and open, and I talk a lot. That means there is nothing when we talking. Talking is that mean anything. But with guys is like; Oh, she talking to me. Therefore, we must have something going on is like no, because I much be talking to everybody else here as well. It is like he noticed you.
So, it is like is this what they always see woman as a target they don’t see woman as another human being like it just they can have a conversation with, get on with, see where it goes. It is like no. I am target in this girl and I am everything I do from here and now, is all about target in that girl and get that girl.
Francisco: Well, these are serious one full tip are giving there. I think that is many guys can benefit from that. If you are listening to that and you are a man. Go back to vitalcoaching.com/datingforman.htm. Everything you need is right there we will be back in a minutes with more. Take care. Bye-bye.
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