Dan: I am suppose to flip this and do something better of myself.
Jennifer: They said we need to add one pot to the rubber band for every show.
Dan: One for every show.
Jennifer: Every show.
Dan: Oh, not right! Not right!
Jennifer: Perfectly right! Okay guys, when is drop—
Dan: One, you get that one.
Jennifer: Okay, guys today, we are talking about tough love, what is this?
Dan: The coin that was here
Jennifer: Oh!
Dan: So I am passing it out. I am passing the coin so to speak.
Jennifer: Thank you, thank you! Okay, so we are Dan and Jennifer from AskDanandJennifer.com—
Dan: I am not being—
Jennifer: Well move over here.
Dan: There is more on your side.
Jennifer: You are bigger than I am. Look, you take about two third—Dan is too busy worried about he looks I am going to get the show started
Okay, we are Dan and Jennifer from AskDanandJennifer.com, and we are here every weekday at 11 a.m. Pacific—oh gosh I did it right! Okay good.
Dan: Wow!
Jennifer: We are talking about all things dating, love, and sex and if you guys have a question for us when we are off line, I am going to put up our forums, I can find them.
Dan: Yes, so yes
Jennifer: There you go. Okay, so, if you have a question and we are not live, you can actually get our forum and ask us a question and we have the weirdest thing happened in our forums that had ever happened. So we are going to come back at a tough love today. We are going to be a little hard on people but this one is different.
For the first time ever, we got a question from a couple. But, we got a question from the wife last week, and a question from the husband, just the other day.
Dan: Yes, yes!
Jennifer: So, independently, completely, separately on their own, they each found our type and our forums and ask us a question. So, I was reading the guy’s question then and oh my boy, this sounds really familiar.
Dan: Wow here comes the other side.
Jennifer: What sounds like a big—okay, so, we are going to actually pin their post at the top of their relationship advice section cause these guys obviously want help. They are both seeking it.
Dan: That can be one thing cheating what is the relationship advice. It will not have to do with cheating sort of.
Jennifer: Not exactly though. I was in a relationship advice—
Dan: Okay, because I pin their—within their categories.
Jennifer: Yes, they are kind of both in the same one. But anyway, if you go to our forums, look for the post from Reese Adams. Okay, we are going to post last week and I think us even talked about it on the show from a lady who have been married for eight years, has two kids with her husband but you know kind of over the years, when her husband got a little bit emotionally disconnected, okay. There has come a gap between them. And she ended up meeting this guy on line. Flew to meet him, ended up having an affair came back told her husband, thought for sure, he was going to dump her, but he did not, okay. He said, “Hey! We can work this out.”
Dan: That is so cool. He wants to fix it.
Jennifer: Yes, and she was going touched. She was like, I expected him to break up with me but he did not. Now what do I do? You know I have feelings for this other guy. But I do not want to ruin my family.” So that was here question and one thing is we got the exact same question from him.
Dan: The opposite side.
Jennifer: From his perspective, let me see the question.
Dan: I have pinned them both.
Jennifer: Oh, I just wanted to pin up the whole thing. But basically, it was the same thing, you know. I had known my wife for 10 plus years, we have two kids. She started chatting on line and then meets this guy, having an affair, right.
Dan: Only Amber is not going to work this one.
Jennifer: No, not this one! But, he thinks that she no longer love him, and she is not sure is she still loves him.
And, he is not sure what to do because he is trying really hard. When all this happened, he did not get bitter. It made him realize, “Wait; there is something worth saving here.”
Dan: Which is so cool!
Jennifer: Which is great! And so, you know, he loves her and he wants her to stay, and she is confused. So they need help. They say they really, really need help.
And I took a bunch of notes because it is so critical like we are going to pin this on our forums because I think this is an opportunity for us and you to really help this couple save their marriage
Dan: Yes, which is so powerful and in a minute, you are going to get his side of the story. So just hang with us here.
Jennifer: Yes well, I am not going to read the whole thing it is too long. But basically, you heard the affair part and they are both dumping to the past to hurt each other and they did not say what he had done in the past, but there is obviously some history there. And, now she says she is in love with this other guy and she is still on the boy.
They both admitted there is an emotional gap there. So she tries to fill it with somebody else, right. that is what happens. And, when we replied to her last week, that is what we said. You are trying to make yourself happy by speaking it from the outside. You need someone else to make you happy, right.
Dan: Yes.
Jennifer: So, our deal was that she need to go inside and try to figure out how to be happy on the inside. Because I really, really thought in this situation, she was just reaching out and trying to find somebody to make her happy because she was not feeling happy right now.
Dan: Absolutely and the grass has greener problem.
Jennifer: Yes, the whole grass is greener.
Dan: When you have been with someone for a whole bunch of years, and such as you let the sex life sort of deteriorate for a while and slowly spiraling to the—
Jennifer: Abyss!
Dan: Abyss, yes. That happens.
Jennifer: Now she thinks she is in love with this other guy and you guys may like it or not, but that whole feeling of being in love, is it just a chemical high?
You know. It is like you did some drugs and your brains and you know releasing all this endorphins and it is making you feel happy. Now you think if this person makes you feel happy—no it just making you high.
Dan: Yes, yes!
Jennifer: You will come down. I think if she does not solve this problem, she is going to find her self in seven or eight years and the same situation maybe sooner, with the new guy.
Dan: That kind of high is good. You know loving that person and really loving him in the moment is the most powerful. And we are definitely not saying stay in a bad relationship that is dysfunctional and broken for years but given a chance.
Jennifer: Yes, definitely! I mean here is the deal for this two, okay. Both are obviously looking for answers and still can’t get over the fact that they found our site independently it is so cool.
Dan: Separately when they are both—it is so cool
Jennifer: We send him an e-mail and he ran her post, and he is like yes that is my wife. So it is kind of cool. But here is the deal, these guys both have to really, really want it, okay. And here is the thing, he definitely wants it she is not so sure.
Dan: Well she is looking at the new guy, and the green grass there.
Jennifer: Yes, exactly! And we had a couple of suggestions on this. One, take some time together no kids, no family, no TV, no computer, nothing. Just the two of you in a deserted island kind of thing.
Go and spend some time together. Try to remember why you like each other, right. You obviously did it one time.
Dan: Yes, what you are doing in the beginning is different from the—
Jennifer: The last few years.
Dan: Yes!
Jennifer: Yes! And also, another option is to give each other some space, okay. It is kind of the opposite of that but, give each other some space to take a breath and say, “Okay, this is where we are now. Not where we were, not where we think we are going to be, this is where I am now and here is where I want to be with relationships. Here is where I want to be with myself” and my only fear with this suggestion is that she runs to this other guy because, this is not going to work, okay.
Dan: I would not go for that. I do not want to see what that is.
Jennifer: But if you decide to take space and she does run to the other guy, just wow. It would not happen anyway right.
Dan: Maybe, but you know what I really think that they should see a professional with this. I think that the best thing these guys could do right now is going to see a professional—a therapist. He is talking to his friends, she is talking to her friends, it is all wasted blah, blah, blah. Completely and utterly useless. And the report is saying and confirming and affirming the dysfunctional in their relationship, and making it worst.
You go to a third party a counselor somebody that does this for a living because it is hard to do that in yourself be as there we do all the time with ourselves, no really. Well we justify our emotional things and logic.
Jennifer: We make an emotional decision and justify with logic.
Dan: And you make a blog to justify it right?
Jennifer: Yes, that too.
Dan: You are both together on the third party as a relationship together and see if you can explain both your sides in what you are trying to do, what you feel is missing
Jennifer: And that to keep point, okay. Not individual counseling, okay because they are going to fix you individually. But together as a couple, to a relationship couples counselor and if nothing else is objective third party can serve as a mediator when the emotions get kind of high. Because obviously, it is hurt and pain in our history.
So, to get through that hurt and the pain, you need a third party going, “Okay that was a snipe. Okay, that was a hurtful thing to say. What are you really feeling?” That kind of stuff.
Dan: Yes, what is making you feel that way because your partners do that as if your wives are going to do that, and say, “Oh men, she always finds problems with me.” But nothing that made you learn to sort ignore sometime over the years, a third party.
Jennifer: Yes, let us see what else. Oh, and he’d asked us in his question if he is crazy for doing all these things and wanting to save his marriage because he is like is it too late and am I wasting my time. And I think absolutely not.
Dan: Hell no! That is so—and he feels bad that I felt it from words. It is here somewhere and something that I picked up on, he is very concerned. He said if you go creepy handed, and damn you know, she cheated on me and I am trying to fix it. I feel stupid here.
No, that is so cool. That is you are trying to fix it, instead of letting your ego drive it because you left your ego and your IQ go—off the cliff.
Jennifer: Okay, so here is the thing. I do know these things you are being like the super perfect husband. You got to recognize she is kind of in a weird state right now because she felt like it was dead and she went out and had an affair. And now she comes back and you are like the perfect husband. She is thinking this is too good to be true.
Dan: Yes!
Jennifer: And guys are bad about this, and you need to make sure it is not the truth that you are trying to win her back and then once you have won the competition, then it is going to go back to the way it was.
Dan: Well, where were we?
Jennifer: So recognize she is in a weird place and the other thing I had on there is, you are going to ask yourself how long are you willing to be this perfect husband and do all these things to show on how much you love her? Because might key sense on that if your answer is anything less than as long as it takes, maybe you should do some soul searching and say this is what you want as well. Is it worth here?
Dan: Absolutely! And you know, you may end up separated. It happens. People separate all the time. Sometimes you divert so much that it happens.
If you guys are just joining us if you have anything to ask us private message us while we are on line and what we will grab it in the moment and also, anytime the forum is the best ways to get our whole community back to work. And that is at the bottom of this I cannot see because I see private messages there.
But anyway, just give it a shot. Try fixing it. Go to a professional third party and see if you can lay all this up. Lay all the baggage on the table and see if you can fix some of it.
Jennifer: And this is where we need your help. Maybe these guys do not want to go to counseling or not, they came to us and we are so flattered. And this is where we want you to help them. When the show is done today, we are going to go on our relationship advice section on the forums and pin both of their post that you can get both of their perspective. And one thing I found admirable is that neither one of them are ragging on the other one.
Dan: See you can definitely in private question there that is fine. We will grab in a minute. We will grab it at the end of the show.
Jennifer: And the topic we are covering today, this was a little bit of tangent. But we are going to dishing out from the tough love today.
We got a couple of questions from some people that they just need to feel love. They need to hear this.
Dan: Anyway, because it is not always the fuzzy approach that works in our opinion. So today, just ask us a few questions, no problem, we will handle it.
Jennifer: Okay and if you are just joining us, we are Dan and Jennifer from askDanandJennifer.com we get every day at 11 a.m. Pacific talking about all things in dating, love and sex and like I said today, we are dishing out from tough love.
You got the question over there do you want to with the first or do you want to take some of these questions first.
Dan: You know what, I think I enjoy watching you do it, it is really hot.
Jennifer: Let us see what these guys are wanting. We have a couple of questions so let us take some from the forums. Okay, that is what you guys are here for, from the chat.
I have a question. Two weeks ago, I had lost my virginity I am barely 16. But my girlfriend said, three times that she was going to come. I thought girls lasted once but, why did guys last only once? Oh boy, that is our question of the today.
Dan: How many guys want to go more than once?
Jennifer: And mostly are Catholic men.
Dan: Look out!
Jennifer: Okay, I do not know your girlfriend but someone made you and let you boom, boom, boom. And some girls lie about it too, so you got to be careful with that.
Dan: Why would you do that—never mind. There is many reason for doing that.
Jennifer: That is a different story.
Dan: A lot of girls can out of box so to speak, do it more than once, which is just so, so amiable. And then it so cool. With the things I got pass at different things—can you stand me up. Oh damn! All I have left is multiple orgasms. Hey you guys, do you think that was funny?
Jennifer: Okay here is a two-second answer on this, okay. The thing with the guy is they can have multiple orgasms but you have to recognize that ejaculation is not orgasm.
Dan: Yes, you did make it you just got it come and then it is not all that ejaculation.
Jennifer: So, my recommendation is do a little Google research on Tantric sex because they really get into a lot of the—
Dan: Separating the after ejaculation before experiencing the orgasm.
Jennifer: What is the thing that we got? Is it the multiple orgasmic man?
Dan: You know there was something like that. I was trying to figure this out from all that and I think it was. Something like multi orgasmic man.
Jennifer: If you are going to look forums, know what we are talking about it is post it up there so he can see it.
Dan: Yes!
Jennifer: Okay
Dan: As you posted in the forum, you pretty sure to give a good answer and well actually go ahead and answer, we will find the book and post it on there.
Jennifer: Let us see. I am a 21-year-old female. My boyfriend and I have been dating for six months. We started having sex four months ago but neither one of us have ever had an orgasm before. What should I look for to tell if it was an orgasm or not?
As a woman, I can tell you will know when it happens. I cannot imagine not knowing.
Dan: Takes probably your whole body, is that so?
Jennifer: Not always, not always.
Dan: Okay fine, but if you have not handled me before, it is a very unique feeling.
Jennifer: The first time I had an orgasm, it was like these weird little twins down there and I was like, oh what was that, that was new!
Dan: I do not think I do not have a twin orgasm perhaps that happens.
Jennifer: You are not a girl.
Dan: You know what. You know I am not.
Jennifer: Which is why you should not be answering this question.
Dan: This seems to be on rag on Dan day.
Jennifer: Look okay an orgasm can be anything from a full body muscle contraction shaking terminally down to this kind of interesting little muscle contractions kind of twitch.
Dan: That is so good.
Jennifer: Can you think of anything else right now from that one?
Dan: Nothing but orgasms at the moment.
Jennifer: Let us see. What is the good blog—female orgasms. I need to think on this.
Dan: Oh, we have like a diva or orgasm expert! We have Lee who is like the orgasm expert on our side. He is a featured author.
Jennifer: Okay, so good website. The female orgasm black book.
Dan: Look at—resources and look for female orgasm it is really easy to find. We have actually bunch of many great authors—articles, I should say probably. And so the female orgasm—
Jennifer: Okay, another question. Let us see, you guys are busy today. This is cool I like it.
Dan: I think the book of if I remember right, was with that bondage series.
Jennifer: Okay, here is another question, my boyfriend and I want to get married but both of us want to finish school first, before we settle down. But we cannot be away from each other. He works in another state, what shall we do?
I do not understand that question and because it is ex-girlfriend claims she has a baby that it is his but he knows it is not, should he still help her, and should we still raise kids even—?
Okay, on the other kid thing, quick genetic test, okay. Go to the hospital and get a blood test that will solve that question once and for all.
And my question is, if it is his baby—yes he needs to take care of and help raise it.
Dan: Does he need to be with her is a different question for another day.
Jennifer: Give the question all together
Dan: But that does not mean it automatically that he needs to be with her. But you may sometimes take care of something that you did not birth. I mean I did not birth that cute little dog to add it up so incredibly much and actually all three of them as it happens, and Sasha.
Jennifer: What does happen to her question?
Dan: Well I am just saying, I did not birth any of these doggies and frankly I have not birth anything. And I love these doggies so much and I take care of them, I love that.
So you can take care some thing that you did not birth. I did not know that when I was younger.
Jennifer: I think you have complicating the questions today.
Dan: Possibly! I am just saying he may still want—
Jennifer: Why would he want to take care of her—
Dan: I am just wondering if he wants to be with her. If he is using that as a thing to be with her, that just might—
Jennifer: That is a good point. Is still there chemistry between him and his ex, that is the real question.
Dan: That was like a pre-recorder there.
Jennifer: I am paying to school to get married, look. Our words on this, what’s the rush? Okay, enjoy the moment if you want to be together, now get married whenever. To us and most people don’t agree with us, some people do and some people don’t but to us marriage is just a contract. You can love each other and be fully committed without the contract.
Dan: Absolutely! And you know, a lot of girls are pressured into conjugated—did you bag him in yet? Alright you got that right you bag them.
Jennifer: Okay, so for the guys who are asking if this life, it is live every day from 11 to 11:30 a.m. Pacific time on weekdays. And the rest of time what we are doing is looping through videos that we prerecorded. So if you come to the show other than 11:00 to 11:30 in the morning you are going to see videos running, okay. But those are obviously prerecorded videos.
Dan: Unless of course if you are watching this in YouTube, on which case please enjoy and watch our other 700 videos. We will be glad you did.
Jennifer: Yes, okay, let us move on. This is so exciting, so many questions.
Dan: Okay, and if you are just joining us we are Dan and Jennifer from AskDanandJennifer.com, I like to hear and say she is really hot. We are here every weekday, 11 Pacific. We try the whole weekend business and you know you just always sober by Sunday afternoon. It just does not always happen.
And any question you have for us dating, love and sex anything in between, in the forms and if you think oh gee I want to help it is important folks because that is what I like doing I want to help people. Go to the forum, lots of people need your help.
Jennifer: Yes, it is so crazy this day. We cannot even begin to answer everyone we try, the best we can but—
Dan: I mean we are getting dozens of questions every day and there is no way we could handle it. But we had such an awesome community I will be quite.
Jennifer: Are you ready?
Dan: I feel it I am ready.
Jennifer: But wait we already did that one? Yes, you want to read that one?
Dan: See boys learn fast.
Jennifer: Do you want to read this one?
Dan: No, and I cannot say why.
Jennifer: Okay. Hey Dan and Jennifer, I have a question for you guys. Since you are talking about tough love, I have been having a problem. My husband and I talked last night and we are getting a divorce. He claims that would be a good idea but I still love him. He thinks it is good for us since we got married too fast.
First of all, let us separate love from divorce, okay. Because it is completely possible to love someone that you are not married to. And it can be hurtful when you love someone and they want a divorce. But, I think I need more information on this one.
Dan Yes, like what is the major reason? I mean the question, are you trying to separate or cancel that legal bond, and why?
Jennifer: Yes, more details on this because it is kind of tough maybe you did get married too fast, maybe he wants to—right?
Dan: Sorry, different topic.
Jennifer: Different topic, and maybe, he has found someone else that he like. I hate to say these things but there is just so many possibilities why, and all of a sudden, he wants a divorce.
Dan: Why does he want a divorce?
Jennifer: Yes! And so hold off, we will more info that and then we will come back.
Dan: Dan has learn not to mention to details. Like a puppy right there—once a upon a time.
Jennifer: Oh, boy, I just tuned in. Hi Rachel.
Dan: We are saying hi to our friend—sorry guys.
Jennifer: Okay, this question reminds me of another question. What shall I do about my fiancé, 17-year-old son seeing me sleep naked. Now when he sees me he blushes, smiles and looks away.
Dan: Teenage boy dream come true.
Jennifer: It reminds me of a question we had a couple of weeks ago where this girl found pictures of her mom naked under their bathroom counter. Unless she want to run the rest of saying your picture are naked under the sun’s bath counter—I will try to avoid that okay.
Dan: It can happen.
Jennifer: It could be suggestive you know.
Dan: But you know what, some people sleep naked and because that comes—
Jennifer: Yes, the other options say, look I sleep naked stay out of my bedroom.
Dan: Yes, really because some of us might sleep naked.
Jennifer: And maybe do not sleep naked on the couch. Okay so, we need to go back on that other question.
Dan: Oh no! I am wrong but I do not think I have been wrong before, now that was long time.
Jennifer: The whole catching your parent’s thing, do you know what that is a suicidal thing. I do not agree with that.
Dan: The fact that you are here, means they did it.
Jennifer: It is because everybody’s parents they hide all their intimacy and they hide their sex from their children’s so the kids grew up and can let their parents never had sex and when they walk in on them actually having sex, it totally freaks them out like oh God!
Dan: That is going to be for a while.
Jennifer: See that does not even bother me. Okay, I am so open about this stuff. I am like, alright Grandpa! I was speaking about that—that little puppies that we got, it is the coolest thing. Their dad is this dog that my dear parents have had for 13 years.
Dan: No, you are not going to tell them that.
Jennifer: This guy is 13 years old and he is still popping it up puppies every year.
Dan: He just wants to go.
Jennifer: Yeah, I forgot to tell you my grandfather has taught this dog, what does he tell? Poke Shep! The girl dog is named Shep, and so he has taught this dog to Poke Shep and every time he says that well, you can get picture. So my grandfather.
Dan I kept telling everybody, stay out the animals, hey there, welcome.
Stay away from the animals it is not just cool.
Jennifer: Okay, tough love. Lots of question today, let us try to get test one.
Dan: If they just joining us tell them who we are.
Jennifer: We are Dan and Jennifer from AskDanandJennifer.com. We are here every weekend 11a.m. Pacific live. Other times you can catch us on video.
Dan: Absolutely!
Jennifer: Answering your question about dating, love and sex. Which one do I want to do? Cause we are running out of time and I want to pick a good one. Oh, this is a good one. I like this why cannot she see my point.
Dan: I fear that gay per se.
Jennifer: I think that that was gay.
Dan: No he said he had a dog that was gay. He said something of that. I cannot believe that I could remember that. Its been so, so many years that South Park is very disturbing.
Jennifer: Tough love question.
Dan: All right guys, back to program. Any questions for the meantime go to forums.
Jennifer: Why can’t she see my point? I have been dating my girlfriend for about three years. We have a one year old daughter. There is one thing that we keep fighting about I do not get along with one of my brothers. I have three brothers, two of them live with us along with her and the daughter. The other one, I do not speak to at all. They had a bad relationship, just never had got along. I have asked my girlfriend several times not to speak with him or be around him and that always leads to a fight, but she still—she still talks to him. Still live with the kids okay.
Dan: Go ahead.
Jennifer: What?
Dan: It was not me.
Jennifer: Last night a friend of hers, and my two brothers including one of the two of my brothers including the one I do not like were hanging out the other room all night, talking getting along having fun. Obviously, my battle is not over and it seems that no matter what I do, she is never going to get my point. Should I bother to fight anymore to hurt our relationship further, what should I do?
Dan: I don’t know, what should he do Jennifer? What do you think?
Jennifer: I have given all of the advice today.
Dan: I am just the comic relief today.
Jennifer: Dan is the comic release today.
Dan: I know. What is up with that?
Jennifer: Okay, I do not know what happen between you and your brother. Whenever it happens, if it has been going the whole time but here is the deal, whatever happen is in the past. I do not care if it happened yesterday it is in the past, right?
Dan: Yes!
Jennifer: Anger, we will talk about anger, okay. Whenever you feel angry with someone this is freaking me out—stop for a second, okay. I am angry, I am mad. How does that make you feel? It makes you feel sick, right. Please stop doing that. It makes you feel thick
Dan: It is the gravest type of feeling and when we feed it, we feed it and makes us more angry and you don’t realize it. I know a lot of people like that some of them too well unfortunately and I am not looking at you.
It is really not a legal—it is not happy, it is enjoy. It is really, really bad thing to go through all the time.
Jennifer: So we are going to challenge you to let go of the anger, and forgive, okay. Do it and it is not for him. You do not even have to tell him that you have forgiven him, okay. But you need to do it for yourself. I believe that anger and resentment and bitterness that you hold on to that is the root cause of cancer and illness and disease.
I truly believe it. You know, they talk about these magnetic fields and all this other stuff but if you are happy, enjoy it and accepting of everything what is going on as such flows right through you. But if you got anger and stuff it covers blockages and all these things that touch on to it and you get sick.
Dan: The people who complain the most are the ones having most problems. And then you can say well, they complain because they have problems. You know what, the people will sit around complaining the most is getting an amazing abundance of things to complain about on daily basis. And I am a true believer, that whatever you focus on grows.
You know, if you focus all the great things in your life, you tend to get more great things in the life. And you know what, if something that does not go well, you start focusing on detail, everybody is going to focus all the things that could go wrong, you get more and more things that could go wrong.
Jennifer: What does this stands brother? With his girlfriend
I do not like him, I am mad at him, I am angry at him. So, why do not you the one to talk to him? Okay guys let us just chill in. It is like control. I do not know why but it is a control thing. She feels like you need to control you.
Dan: It is an illusion or looking for more things to be upset about. That is focus. You cannot tell the other person I am keeping of regards, so you cannot talk to him even if you are little more involved and do not have the grudge thing. That is just lame.
Jennifer: Well maybe, he feels like you cannot control his brother so he is going to control his girlfriend.
Dan: And you know what that is just a very frustrating experience. You are going to get more things to be frustrated about. You cannot control anybody but yourself. Much as I like too sometimes.
Jennifer: And do not try to use your daughter as a bargaining chip to get your way with your brother that is lame. So this is a tough loving for one, okay. ultimatum do not work, okay. Do not threaten your girlfriend. Now you know if your girlfriend is sleeping around or something like that, that is the different deal. But it sounds like—
You know, they are hanging out and having fun. You can join in the fun, or you can go to the other room, right. But do not be mad about it. Answered?
Dan: Yes! I think that will work.
Jennifer: Okay, what are we getting in here?
Dan: Okay, we got a lot of action here, what is going on.
Jennifer: Let us see. Okay, are we married or just friends? Neither.
Dan: Neither? Oh—
Jennifer: Okay, we got more details on the question earlier. He claims that he got married too fast, remember this was the one that the guy wanted to divorce and things got married too fast. We got married too fast right after college and he says he does not think that we were meant to be together. The reason why we got married is because I was pregnant and we are having a baby. But I married him because I love him so he had given me a bunch of different reasons.
It sounds to me like he wants out.
Dan: Sounds to me that he wants out too. Hold on and you had his baby, you are not portable, self-propelled incubator okay?
I am sorry, this whole thing, I am having his baby. No, you are having a baby and the man has something to do with it. You know, you are both having a baby but you are not having his baby like driving his car. This mentality that having his baby, you are having a baby, that he had a part of and you are both having a baby.
Jennifer: Okay, so much check. Yes, I do not know what to tell you in this situation given to me.
Dan: And I am just wondering, what issues you guys are having that he wants out for? Did you guys used to have lots of sex and stop?
I am just wondering, what is up?
Jennifer: Well, that is your logical brain. There may not be a logical—
Dan: There may not be and that is just fine. I am just wondering we are in the tough love and also try to save a relationship if it is all possible today. So, I am just wondering what the issue is.
Jennifer: And regardless you got to respect his decision because you can fight it and you can hold on, and it is going to make it more difficult but it sounds like the decisions have already been made.
Dan: Damn it, I am already giving up on this.
Jennifer: That is how it feels, okay. I say that a lot. I feel that this is what is going on.
Dan: Maybe not, he is up in the form of this longer version of this and maybe, we can get something else.
Jennifer: No, no! You see that puppy right. You know a puppy will be chasing a ball when somebody throws a rope on him over this. And it chases—you throw a bone at it and Dan is cling into a puppy.
Dan: It is just you or did a hot girl say to her—
Jennifer: Puppy when you think about Dan.
Dan: We are just talking about forums today and I tried to be serious at one time and it hurts. I had like high of still.
Jennifer: So I think we are going to continue this discussion tomorrow. And we go through one of our question but we wile come back again tomorrow and finish all the questions on tough love, okay. People making hard decisions, and what we think about it, maybe people think a little rigid what we think about that.
Dan: Yes!
Jennifer: So again, we are Dan and Jennifer: from AskDanandJennifer.com and we will see you guys back here tomorrow, the 11 a.m. Pacific.
Dan: Yes, if somebody is saying where are all these discussions come from, from the forums. We pick one everyday when we do the show for the day. So post up your questions in the forum and it may not or may be on the show.
Jennifer: It depends on my inspiration.
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