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Jennifer: Hi, we are here with Dating and Relationship Coach with Victoria Rogers. She is the author of the Automatic Second Date and the Founder of mantokeep.com. Now, get this, Victoria has been more than a hundred first dates in about a year, year and a half time frame, and more than 98 of those dates asked her on the second date.
Dan: Wow!
Jennifer: Yes, that is incredible. And, today we are talking to Victoria not only that kind of have to get that first date but you know, what do you do and what do you not do on that first date to guarantee a second date.
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Okay, into Automatic Second Date, Victoria. You talked about something called mirroring. What exactly is that and how do you use that to your advantage on a date?
Victoria: Mirroring is a really important thing to do when you are trying to connect with somebody, and when you are already connected with somebody, you do it automatically. Everybody that you have been around for a long time that you have a relationship with, you are mirroring all the time. Look at you two. It is just so automatic.
Dan: [Laughing]
Jennifer: Wait, hold on. I have a total destruction. Our dogs do that all the time. We have a German shepherd and then a Yorkie, and it is so funny when they are sleeping, they mirror each other when they are sleeping. It is so bizarre.
Dan: And, they are sleeping all day long so, we see this a lot.
Victoria: But in relationships that is good. But without relationship is branded. When you are trying to connect, you are going to do it deliberately. This works in business and it works in relationships and all it is basically let us talk volume. If they are talking quietly, you talk quietly. If you speed up, they speed up. If you are sitting at a restaurant and you notice that they are sitting way forward and you been leaning back? You just start leaning forward like they are and they are going to suddenly feel you are connecting with them.
Jennifer: Yes, it feels comfortable all of a sudden.
Victoria: Yes.
Jennifer: You do not know why but all of a sudden, you are very comfortable with this person.
Dan: So you are helping the training process?
Victoria: You are.
Dan: So that you get on the same page?
Victoria: Again, that is so important. That is so important Dan. and I have been asked but are they not going to notice? Are not they going to be offensive?
Dan: That is not a trick.
Victoria: They do not. They do not notice because it is not a trick. It is just that you care enough about them that you want to get in the moment and connect with them.
Dan: That is cool.
Jennifer: That is great!
Dan: That is really great.
Jennifer: We have to try that. Let us go meet some stranger and see if we can mirror them.
Victoria: It is fun too.
Jennifer: [Laughing] I do that all the time that is why I am laughing. There is more from the business perspective so, anyway Victoria, who wants to get the Automatic Second Date. Where is the best place?
Victoria: The best place is to go to my website at www.ManToKeep.com.
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