Reconnect with Your Middle Schooler this Summer
Over the past 20 years of working with kids, there is one truth that I am truly certain of that is that kids know when you are genuinely interested in who they are and what's important to them, you can't fake it. It’s like they're having intuitive sense about them so they know who the people are that are genuinely interested and they tend to gravitate towards these folks.
This is of interest to me right now and should be of interest to you too parents right now because we’re coming upon a time, summer, when you have an opportunity perhaps to spend the greatest amount of time with your kids. They're out of school and they maybe engaged in summer camps or other activities but generally speaking they have a lot more time on their hands, so tremendous opportunity for you the parent to get connected.
And I like to talk a lot about connection especially during the middle school years because as kids tend to want to drift away from parents, it’s real easy for parents to also move that direction away from their kids. And simply chuck it up to the fact that they probably rather spend more time with their friends and sometimes that’s true but they still need you and they still need to build that relationship with you.
So my challenge to you today, number one: think about how you currently spend your time with your kids. Is it just simply two shifts kind of passing in the night, you see each other at breakfast maybe or at dinner or kind of eat in shifts maybe you're even eating in the car. Maybe those are the important conversations that you're sharing going to and from different activities you're doing from school. How are you spending your time?
Challenge number two: think about how you might change how you spend your time together. Here’s something of a tip that I want to share with you. The best way to show your kids that you are genuinely interested in what's important to them and who they are is to simply as the question “what are you up to?” Show me something that you're doing right now and be genuinely interested in what they have to say by putting all other things aside and giving them a 100% of your attention, they will love you for.
Now in middle school, they may not acknowledge that love in the same way they did in elementary school with a hug, but you will see them begin to respond and share with you. That’s when you know that they know that you're genuinely interested.
So take on those two challenges as you get yourself into this summer months and what I'm sending is that by the end of the summer and turn of the next school year, things will be dramatically different in your family.
So a couple of things for you to think about this week and I hope you're headed towards an incredible Memorial Day weekend. Take care of yourselves.
Transcription by:
Scribe4you Transcription Services