Jennifer: Hey, this question is from Kevin in Texas.
Dear Dan and Jennifer,
I like my best friend. There is trouble there already. And I want to ask her out but I do not know how. Many other guys like her too. How do I make myself seem like the one she should go out with and how would I do that?
Dan: We are on spot.
Jennifer: The tough spot to be in.
Dan: That is a really a tough spot to be in. the best friend issue that is such a flag already.
Look. Is there or is there not chemistry? Not that you have fantasies about being with her, when you are with her, do you feel that electric—?
Jennifer: That sexual tension.
Dan: Sexual tensions, you feel it. You get hot, is there chemistry there or there is not? You talk about being her best friend, and it is absolutely, definitely okay to be friends with people of the opposite sex.
Jennifer: Dan is my best friend. We are best friends but there is also chemistry.
Dan: Oh, yes! There is absolutely chemistry. But you got to be able to tell the difference. You know a lot of guys will get to be friends with the girl just to get close to her and again what we call the friend zone. And they get stuck in the friend zone where a gay guy would normally end up and he is going to be treated—
Jennifer: You are safe.
Dan: You are going to get as much action as much as her gay friends will because you are her confidant, you are her friend that is going to hear about this guy that has hidden on her and this guy she had sex with yesterday.
Jennifer: You are basically another girl friend, okay.
Dan: So, the friend zone is for other girl friend type guys. And that is cool; you can have friends that are girls. Absolutely, if there is chemistry there, you know, you feel it but if you are not listening to yourself and you stay in the friend zone, you are lost.
Jennifer: Yes, and now that you are there, you got to ask yourself. If you go to her now, and you try to change the status quo, you may lose a really good friend. So, you have to ask yourself, is it worth the risk?
So, you know kind if weigh out what is more important. You know, do you want to be her friend, or do you want to be her boyfriend at the risk of loosing her as a friend?
Dan: Yes.
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