Hi. This is Francisco Bujan from VitalCoaching.com. We are talking about getting success for guys and the topic this video is turn your best friend into your lover, how? This is an answer to a question that I got from my channel and you know, you are dating or you had already a friend, a female friend that you are really attracted to and you would like to turn her into your date and you like to have a relationship with her and you do not know how to change this friendship into a real relationship, okay.
So, what I am going to tell here is super important if you are tracking this kind of situation and you really fancy her. Here are a couples of tips or couple of ideas that you have to set up line. What you have to realize it is that when you are in the friend’s zone, the sexual attraction between the two of you is very low. It means that, she feels comfortable with you; she feels you know happy chatting and having you know, nice exchanging with you but her sexual attraction levels towards you is very low. She will feel attracted sexually to a guy but to you usually it means that this is not right now happening and what you have to do if you want to go from friend to lover, you have to shift that, you have to start behaving in different way, in the way you relate to her.
One of the key is the mistakes that you can make when you are relating to her; it is that, right now she owns the power in the way you relate with each other. It means that, if she needs anything, she calls you 3:00 in the morning and asking you to show up at her place, you will take the car, your car and go, and do that straight away. If she wants to chat because she is sad about another relationship or if she wants to share anything, anytime you drop everything that you are doing and go and rescue her, right. That is what you intend to do as a very good male friend, why? Because she owns you, okay.
The level of power that you have right now between the two of you, you know, the balance of power is lot in her advantage. That is specially if you fancy her out and if you really would like to have a relationship with her, she is extremely sexy, extremely attractive, you are really madly in love with her, but, when you are around she is not that attracted to her, not much in to you. So, when you are in that specific situation, again, the balance of power is very much in her advantage, it means that she is coarse up here and you are down here, and she knows that, okay. She knows what is going in terms of dynamic. Does not mentally get it but, in terms of emotional response and in terms of meeting her needs, right now you are fulfilling her certain growing in her life and she likes that. If it is her choice right now, she prefers keeping you in the friend role and dating other guys, okay. She does not want to shift that. Why? Because you know, having a certain practice tabbed between the two you give her comfort. Okay, she enjoys that, he enjoys having you as a best friend and somebody she can relay on. If she needs to move, she needs to change anything in he life you are there to come and rescue her, okay. That gives her certain amount of security. So, she does not want to change that, you have to realize also that when she has new best fiend and then she has another male, as her lover or relationship or life partner then that gives true guys who are focus on one woman, okay. And, she gets twice as much attention because of that twice as much energy, twice as much love and she likes that, okay.
So you have to realize in terms of pole dynamics or any of exchange there is something, there is a reason why she is putting you into the friend zone, okay.
So now what do you do about that, if you had it, if you do not want to be release best friend and want to get the full benefit of her full relationship, you have to shift absolutely in the way you relate to her. Stop agreeing and be kind and being the nice guy who accepts everything she wants and says. This is the last thing that the key idea is to shift the power balance and to start generating sexual attraction between the two of you and all the thing that you have to do is start racing your level of power until you are at least on the same level as her. And to do that, it means that very often she will look at you and she will say, “you are a nice guy but something is missing in you” and what is missing most of the times, it is luck of power in one or the other area, okay. Very often it will be luck of material power that carry with your job or carry your ambitions or both, these kinds of things. And, one has to do with body, sometimes it will be enough to go to the gym start triangulate a little better and building up some muscles for her to think, wow, you know, you really look quit good, okay. So, that is another way of building up power. Another one is to do with creative energy in life, you know. Supposed that you, deficiency with the guy who tends to be as so naïve, who is social but she, you are there for her always, all this sort shortens to lower your level of power, we need to increase your social value and for her to realize that you have a lot of friends. You have a positive network of friends and also those other women are attracted to you, you have to let her see, that is all.
So this is the best topic if you let to ID and go back to my site and check the dating resources for guys, it is at vitalcoaching.com/datingformen.htm, dating for men is just in one word. Get the resources there, get the books and it will give you the boost. Take care and bye-bye.
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