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Jennifer: Hi, we are here with dating relationship coach Victorya Rogers. She is the author of the Automatic 2nd Date and the founder of mantokeep.com.
Now, Victorya has been on more than a hundred first dates. In about a year, you are going to have a timeframe and more than 98 of those dates asked her on a second date.
Male: Wow!
Jennifer: Yes, that is incredible. And today, we are talking to Victorya not only that on how to get that first date but what you are doing and what you are not do on that first date to guarantee a second date.
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Should I put out on my first date?
Male: Is it where you see, do not put it out on the first date. Why not? Why should you not put out on the first date, what is wrong with that?
Victorya: People come to me, they are looking for relationship. They are tired of the hook ups and never coming back from the guy. If you are looking for a potential relationship, then do not put out on that first date. But, I mean, you can kiss him and make out if you want to, but do not end up in bed on that first date. Because if you do, that is far from guarantees that he is going to call you back. At least not first, he will call you back if he was good.
Male: Yes.
Victorya: He will call you back, but he is going to call you back like at midnight or 10 o’clock. That is exactly what will you get.
Male: Oh no!
Victorya: And plus, some many instant happening in the start, beginning to know each other has stopped. It is stopped—
Male: It is to keep the mystique going, keep the interest going, keep the discovery process going. Do not just sneak in old—come to a hop because he want to
Victorya: Yes! He wanted to be attractive to you because if you want—you come back for more.
Male: But if you do want to have sex, but do not just do it yet. Keep learning by each other, keep getting, okay, let us drink to that.
Victorya: So, what if, I have a question about like, if you have been in a long-term relationship because I have a lot of friends and they have got their kids or whatever and they are divorced. They were married for 10 years and they are very comfortable with that sexual relationship. You know, what do you tell those women so that they do not—
Male: Then they are used to holding back.
Jennifer: Jumping too fast, you know.
Victorya: Yes, and it is about deciding what you want ahead of time. If you are really ready for another relationship, you got to have self-control. You got to have that self-respect to go. You know what? He maybe the hottest thing I have ever seen, but I want a chance to having a relationship with this guy. And the other thing is, sorry ladies, but whatever you do with this guy on the first date, he is positive and you will have to agree, he is positive, you done with every other first date you would ever had.
Victorya: I think it is true.
Jennifer: You act sluty, he is going to assume you were a slut.
Victorya: Yes, even if it is not accurate.
Male: I cannot say any.
Jennifer: No.
[Laughter]
Victorya: Because it is true!
Male: I have been trying to comment.
Jennifer: He is tumbling his words. I think we have caught him up. Okay, so where can we get the Automatic 2nd Date?
Victorya: You can get more of the secrets at the Automatic 2nd Date is www.mantokeep.com.
Male: Cool, thanks Victorya.
Victorya, you see guy should always pay on the first date, why? Why should the guy always pay? Why should the guy always?
Victorya: They are not really.
Male: Okay, we are not—I tend to paying, but I have all motives.
Victorya: And that is fine, you can, but here is the bottom line. So many women think that they are on a date when they are going and when a guy says, let us come along, let us go there. But if the guy is not paying, it is not a date. You are friends, you are casual, you are buddies. If he is paying, it is a date.
Male: Is this just a title thing or what?
Victorya: Because you are not investing, if you are not paying, then you are investing, you do not have guilt to bond around it, you do not have any emotional investment. Now, imag
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